


The Little Black Book

by Mystie_Helix



Series: Souls of Katharsi [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Being Lost, Death, F/M, Father-Son Relationship, Five Stages of Grief, Grief/Mourning, Homelessness, Identity Issues, Independence, Leaving Home, Mother-Son Relationship, Parenthood, Running, Running Away, Teenage Rebellion
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-13
Updated: 2015-01-23
Packaged: 2018-03-07 09:56:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3170609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mystie_Helix/pseuds/Mystie_Helix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kuro has no idea how lucky he is to even exist. His extraordinary parents made him the center of their world. He lives in Katharsi, a world of spirits and magic. He grew up believing in his parents and their ideals.</p><p>Kuro spent most of his childhood blissfully unaware of his unfortunate predicament. He is stuck in the middle of a war for human souls. His parents, Jouten and Ayamaru, knew the importance of winning such a war. They needed to win to ensure Kuro's future. His parents did what they thought was best; they did what they had to in order to protect their son. </p><p>He expected his father to have answers to his questions about his mother's mysterious disappearance; Jouten did not. He couldn't tell Kuro the truth – that he killed Ayamaru. Jouten, the omniscient and all-powerful, was unprepared for Ayamaru's death. Ayamaru was the anchor that kept Jouten from insanity. With her gone, he was doomed to lose himself. In the end, he lost them both before he started high school.</p><p>Kuro was lost. He wandered the battlefield that was Katharsi. His instincts protected him but he was nothing without his parents guidance. Filled with his grief and hatred, Kuro searches for the answers questions.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Father's Fortune

**Author's Note:**

> This is the prequel to Dawn of Inception. Kuro searches for answers to questions he never knew existed. He is faced with the decision to take up the mantle as a warrior for humanity like his parents.

    An unrecognizable man arrived home in the dead of night. Jouten had dismissed his heavy armor and his seraphic wings. He still donned his long, wavy, white hair and an abundance of unkempt facial hair. His long beard was darkened, stiff and matted with the evidence of his nocturnal deeds. He was covered in blood. It caused his skin to stick to his white cotton T-shirt and jeans. He had deep creases around his eyes. His gray-blue orbs were dark and hollow. His face was twisted in grief and pain.  
  
    Jouten took the back way in. He stomped over the heavy overgrowth leaving only his large boot prints behind. He walked with his back arched forward. He stayed close to the trees as he moved through the forest.  
  
    The wolves had stopped howling and he was able to find some peace in the pre-dawn hours he had alone. He lingered in the frostbitten summer air. His solitude gave him perspective. He knew it had to be done. It was the only way to keep their son safe.  
  
          No amount of logic or rationality could fill the unexpected hole in his chest. His body ached, but his heart was empty. He was no longer capable of being the man he once was. He was broken and about to lose control. Never had a more dangerous man walked the halls of his earthly home.  
  
    Jouten was still determined to go on pretending nothing had changed. By pure strength of will, he would continue to play his part as Kuro's father. It was his responsibility to raise him now. He pushed himself to be the man he used to be. He rushed inside and warped to his bedroom.  
  
    He cleaned up before anyone could see him. The water pouring through the shower head was almost deafening in comparison to the silence he had endured. He stood still and let the water pour over him. The crystal clear spring water quickly turned orange as it passed over his skin and circled the drain. The tiny rivers that streamed down his muscular back and wide shoulders became darker and darker by the time they reached his bulky calves. The dry mud stuck to the bottom of his feet quickly loosened as the moisture soaked through. Eventually, the water cleansed him of the dirt, blood, sweat and tears that had disguised him.  
  
    His face took the longest to clean. The blood had caked his white hair together like glue. The hot water scolded his scalp. He endured the liquid wrath stubbornly. The water rinsed over his filthy skin. He lathered the musky, oak scented body wash over his skin. He dug his nails into his skin as he exfoliated. The soapy suds turned pink. The washrag fell to the ground with chunks of dried blood stuck to it. Even the white suds of the body wash were tainted while he was washing.  
  
    Then, just as he stepped out of the shower and grabbed his towel, the alarm went off. He knew his son would be awake any minute. He couldn't let him see him like that. Suddenly, his fatherly instincts kicked in and his focus shifted entirely. His exterior appearance changed, too. He gazed at his young complexion and tame hair.  With unprecedented haste, he dried off and got dressed.  
  
    He rushed out of his bedroom in the nick of time. He almost knocked his lithe son over as he hurried down the hall. Jouten froze, catching Kuro by the shoulders. Jouten was two feet taller than the twelve year old boy before him.  
  
    There he was. He was the epitome of innocence. It was unthinkable that a child like that could be born from the most selfish and manipulative beings on Earth. It didn't matter how many lives they had taken or terrible choices that they had made, he was there. Kuro saved his parents from themselves and he had no idea.  
  
    Jouten smiled down at Kuro as if the entire universe fit in the hallway. He knew how to be Kuro's father but it was only a matter of time before he was unable to keep up the charade.  
  
    “Where's Mom?” He asked curiously.  
  
    “She asked me to get you up and off to school today. She said she has a headache.” Jouten did his best to sound convincing.  
  
    “Well, I should go in and give her a kiss before we leave, that'll make her feel better!” Kuro's enormous smile and confident stride showed how sure of himself he was.  
  
    Jouten quickly scooped the boy up into his arms and tossed him over his shoulders. “I'm sure you're right, kiddo, but let's let her sleep. You know how grumpy she can be.”  
  
    Kuro squirmed at first and then relaxed. “Alright.” He conceded. “But can you put me down? You're gonna wrinkle my shirt.” His preadolescence had taught him the vainer side of pride.  
  
    Just before they approached the stairs, Jouten gently set his son on his feet. Reflexively, Kuro straightened his collar and sleeves. Then, they hurried downstairs for breakfast.  
    

* * *

  
  
    “I completely forgot. It's picture day, isn't it?” Jouten leaned back against the stove and watched Kuro chow down on a bowl of sugary cereal.  
  
    Kuro nodded in reply. He shoveled his face full of the bowl's sweet, milky contents as if it were the only food in the world.  
  
    “So, that explains why you're all dressed up.” Jouten continued to try to have a conversation with his son as he devoured his food.  
  
    A few, almost silent minutes later, Kuro slurped the milk from the bottom of the bowl. He hopped down off of the stool and put it in the sink.  
  
    “You know, you look really sharp, so here, I have something for you,” Jouten stopped Kuro before he headed for the door. He grabbed something from his pocket and held it out for Kuro. “I know how much you love your hair.”  
  
    Kuro snatched the simple, metal comb from his father and shined it in the air. “Whoa! It's awesome!” He exclaimed and started to comb it through his straight, shoulder length, black hair.  
  
    Jouten smiled and then started to riffle through the kitchen drawers. He searched through each one twice before he finally found what he was looking for. He reached out and pulled Kuro's suit jacket  off of the back of the bar stool. He brushed his object over its surface and began removing the lint and hairs from it.  
  
    “I've been looking for one of those!” Kuro shouted again in excitement.  
  
    “Here, it's all yours.” Jouten handed Kuro the lint roller.  
  
    Kuro put it in his backpack and pocketed the comb. He slipped on his jacket and his smile grew wider. Then, he looked away from Jouten and almost frowned.  
  
    “Hey, Dad? I didn't want to bother you before, but...” his voice trailed off in bashfulness.  
  
    “What is it?” Jouten asked.  
  
    “I wanted to wear a tie to impress Mom, but I don't know how to tie one. I couldn't ask her if I wanted it to be a surprise. So, can you teach me?” Kuro was embarrassed to ask his father for help with something he thought was so simple.  
  
    “Well... I thought I'd have to wait until prom for you to ask me that!” Jouten laughed in surprise. “You're way ahead of your class, kid! Let's go show you how to tie a tie.” Jouten was filled with joy and excitement.  
  
    Jouten placed his hand on Kuro's shoulder and transported them to Kuro's bedroom. He almost laughed again when he saw all the ties laid out on the bed and the half tied ones on the floor in front of the mirror.  
  
    “Did you pick one out?” Jouten asked sincerely.  
  
    “I think I just want a regular black one, since my coat is black and my shirt is white. I wanna look like a secret agent!” Kuro's enthusiasm filled Jouten with a light he thought had disappeared.  
  
    “I look forward to having our own little James Bond for the day,” Jouten looked down at Kuro lovingly.  
  
    Kuro stepped in front of the full length mirror standing in the corner. Jouten picked up the small, black tie and wrapped it around Kuro's shoulders. He adjusted it so that the wide end extended far below the narrow end.  
  
    “This is how you start,” Jouten explained.  
  
    Kuro nodded as he watched with wide eyes soaking every moment in. Jouten loved the way his son's eyes glittered with admiration.  
  
    “Then you cross the long end over the short side; then you wrap the long end under it.” Jouten paused to let Kuro memorize the first two steps, then he continued. “The next step is wrapping the long end over the top of the short end once more.” He paused as he straightened the layers of the tie in his hand. “Now, you have to pull the long end up through the loop you made around the neck and then down through the hole you made.” Jouten quickly slipped the tie up under Kuro's chin and then down through the knothole. It was loose and messy for a moment before he pinched the knot and removed the slack. It lay just below Kuro's top button as Jouten moved to the side.  
  
    “I didn't go too fast, did I?” Jouten smiled at him.  
  
    Kuro watched his father's long hands twist the tie over, under, over, up and through so effortlessly, he was almost jealous.  
  
    “Nope,” he replied pleasantly.  
  
    “Alright, now tighten it under your collar and let's go.” Jouten held out Kuro's jacket.  
  
    Kuro pinched the knot and pulled the front part of the tie as he maneuvered it close to his throat.  Once he was satisfied with its tightness, he punched one arm through the sleeve of his dress coat and then again with the other.   
  
    Jouten looked down at Kuro mischievously. “I'll race you to the car!”  
  
    Kuro made eye contact with his father for a half second before he darted out the doorway. Even with his lack of height, his stride was long and graceful. His legs were thin but powerful. His dress shoes and jacket did not hinder his speed.  
  
    Jouten launched himself after Kuro. He found his enormous, gaping stride first and then began to jog. Once he was in the hallway, he picked up speed. Kuro was several yards ahead of him. He seemed to tiptoe down the stairs, unaware that his father was closing in on him. Kuro was on the first landing on the stairwell when Jouten leaped into the air. The high ceilings gave him plenty of clearance as he moved through the air. He heard his father behind him. He turned to see him hanging above him.  
  
    Jouten landed just behind Kuro. His shoulder was perpendicular with Kuro's back. Kuro didn't turn around. He sprinted down the stairs, with his hand on the railing, to the second landing and then he swung himself around the corner. Jouten just smiled as he watched Kuro. He bounced down the stairs without haste, but he picked up speed once he was on level ground again. He raced through the living room and kitchen and then down the last hallway to the balcony. He snatched Kuro's backpack from the bar stool as he passed and tossed it over his shoulder. Kuro's little, black chess knight key chain was tossed violently around in circles.  
  
    Kuro stopped for a second once he was out in the open. The car was at the base of the mountain. He turned and looked for Jouten. He was no where in sight. He smiled to himself and began jogging down the path. His face had become moist with sweat and his hair was tangled from the wind but he didn't care. All of his worries and woes disappeared when he ran. It was his escape from reality.  
  
    Jouten watched Kuro take off down the narrow, asphalt path. He finished the first straight away and was turning the first corner. He was almost half way down the mountainside. Jouten started to follow Kuro. He let him keep a steep lead for most of the path, but once he was around the third bend, Jouten got serious.  
  
    He inhaled sharply and tucked his head. He hunched his shoulders forward and bent down. He pushed off of the ground as hard as he could to propel his body forward. His feet began to pedal him down the mountainside at an alarming rate. His strength and gravity almost pushed him too hard. Jouten's thoughts had to catch up with how quickly he was moving, but before he could, he was right behind Kuro.  
  
    “Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Kuro! Go! Get out of the way!” Jouten shouted at him.  
  
    Kuro turned to see Jouten on his tail. He slowed down for a half second and was almost plowed over. Kuro pushed himself as hard as he could to get off the path and out of Jouten's way. Kuro flung himself and all of his momentum into the side of the big, black S.U.V. parked at the end of the path.  
  
    Jouten quickly observed that he did not have the same luxury. He was going too fast and he was too big. He would seriously damage anything he ran into to stop himself.  
  
    Kuro lay hunched over on the hood of the S.U.V. The hot, morning sun had already warmed the paint and it stuck to him as he pulled himself upward. His face was beat red and his hair was fluffed up in every direction.  
  
    Kuro turned just in time to see Jouten jump into the air and over the S.U.V. His mouth fell slack in awe of his father. He quickly ran around to the other side of the vehicle to watch his father land. Jouten's feet smashed into the asphalt like a wrecking ball being dropped on it. It cracked in a half dozen directions. The whole parking lot shook for a second. Jouten just stood there with Kuro's backpack gripped tightly to his shoulder. He was hunched over and completely still for what seemed like an eternity.  
  
    Kuro quickly forgot about his physical discomfort and ran to his father's aid.  
  
    “Dad! Are you alright?!” His pupils narrowed in the sunlight as he focused on his father.  
  
    Jouten nodded and then erected himself slowly. He cleared his throat and then coughed. His legs and hips were numb, but they were still holding him up. All of the momentum he had created a shock wave through his entire body and the parking lot. His body was not quite as solid as the  ground beneath him and so most of that energy rippled through every muscle. He was stunned.  
  
    Jouten took a long, deep breath in before he tried to move his feet. Kuro winced as he saw the pain his father was in. Jouten moved slowly and used his breath to focus himself. With each sharp inhale and exhale, Jouten flexed and stretched his muscles. He moved his toes and then each foot before initiating a step. With one leg out in front, he bent at the knee and twisted at the waist. He took another step, with the opposite foot forward and stretched again.  
  
    He finally stood straight and scratched his head. “Wow, that was a doozy!” He laughed at himself. His smile reassured Kuro that he was fine. “I guess that means you won, now, didn't you?”  
  
    “Only cause you scared the crap out of me!” Kuro fired back at him.  
  
    Jouten laughed again. “Oh, you're fine.” He patted Kuro's shoulder and handed him his backpack. “You almost forgot this.”  
  
    Kuro smiled. “Oh, yeah, I guess I did. Oops.” He moved around to the other side of the car and hopped in. He dropped his backpack at his feet and buckled himself in.  
  
    Jouten followed his son's lead and got into the car. “We should probably get going, huh?” Jouten reached behind him and grabbed the seat belt.  
  
    He reached into his pocket for the keys. They were not there. He tried his other pocket, but it was empty too. A look of annoyance stretched across his face.  
  
    “Did you leave the keys inside? I can go get them.” Kuro inquired.  
  
    “No, no, stay put. We're already running late,” Jouten snapped his fingers and his car keys appeared in his hand. He isolated the ignition key and started the car. He carefully backed up. The wheel dipped into the pot holes he created. Then, he finally pulled out of the huge driveway.  
    

* * *

  
  
    Once they were on the highway, Jouten reached into the compartment between the seats and grabbed a handful of napkins. He pinched one between his fingers for himself and held the rest out for Kuro. He wiped his face clean and fixed his hair in the rear view mirror.  
  
    Kuro took the napkins and dropped them in his lap. He flipped down the visor and pulled out his new comb. He held onto the roots as he yanked on some of the knots. He patted his face clean of the excess oil that had pooled on his forehead and under his eyes. His hair reflected the sunlight coming in through the window. Once his face and hair were to his liking, he smiled to himself.  
  
    “Thanks,” he said to his father.  
  
    Jouten nodded. “Your mother would be very proud of you, you know that?” He started to get sappy.  
  
    “Dad! Stop it!” Kuro felt shy and bashful again.  
  
    Jouten smiled to himself as he saw Kuro's cheeks turn red.  
  
    Kuro turned away and stared out the window.  
  
    Jouten looked side to side. There was surprisingly little traffic at 8:00 AM on a Monday. He checked his blind spots and then looked over at Kuro. “Hey, wanna drive?”  
  
    Kuro furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “What?!” He exclaimed in surprise.  
  
    “Do you?” Jouten repeated himself more seriously.  
  
    “You'd really let me do that? Now?” Kuro was hesitant, but secretly he wanted to push Jouten out the driver's side door.  
  
    “I wouldn't mess with you like that. I'm serious. Do you want to drive or not?” Jouten lifted his hands off of the steering wheel and put them behind his head.  
  
    The enormous car seemed to swerve onto the rumble strips with his carelessness, but he had full control of the car with his knee. Kuro unbuckled himself and threw himself over the arm rests. He grabbed the wheel and pulled them back into the middle of the lane.  
  
    Jouten pulled the seat back as far as it would go. Only his toes could touch the pedals.  
  
    Kuro knew what to do next. He had done it dozens of times before whenever his mother wasn't with them. It was one of their father-son secrets. He crawled over the cup holders and arm rests onto Jouten's lap. He had never been allowed to drive on the highway before. The fastest he had gone was fifty-five miles an hour. Now, he was on the edge of eighty.  
  
    Jouten reached out to steady the wheel as he relaxed his knee for Kuro to sit. His seat was leaned back so that Kuro could sit up straight without being pinched between him and the wheel. Jouten lay one hand on the door and one on Kuro's hip. His childish frame was nothing to Jouten. He did not weigh more than ninety pounds.  
  
    Kuro held the steering wheel with one hand and adjusted the rear view mirror with the other. He smiled at his father when they made eye contact. His hands were almost as big as his mother's now. He gripped the wheel and felt every bit of speed and power that surged through the vehicle. He flexed his hands and his knuckles faded from red to white each time. It didn't matter that Jouten controlled their speed, Kuro felt like he was on top of the world as his focus narrowed on the cars around him.  
  
    Then suddenly, it was just them. Kuro and Jouten were the only two people on the entire planet. All the other vehicles seemed still as they passed. Kuro's heartbeat became rapid and his awareness grew wider. His peripheral vision seemed to stretch wide around him with his hair tucked behind his ears.  
  
    Kuro's physiology finally began to reflect his mental state. His heartbeat calmed and the adrenaline washed out of his veins. His mouth was dry, but he felt whole. Kuro was in a state of complete calm. His anxieties had melted away and he was left with just himself. It did not matter that he was sitting on his father's lap and not actually in control.  
  
    It was not long before it was time to exit the highway and integrate with everyone else in the city. Kuro saw the exit sign and signaled properly as he changed lanes. Once he was over all the way, Jouten let off the gas pedal and slowed the car. It felt like they were crawling, but Kuro held the wheel as they circled the off ramp with confidence.  
  
    When they were stopped at the light, Jouten tapped Kuro's hip. He knew it was time to get back into his own seat. He moved with the reluctance of any child in a similar situation, but with enough haste to show his gratitude. He knew the risk his father took by letting him drive. They shared a look that expressed their secret bond.  
  
    As Jouten maneuvered his way through the city, Kuro could not shake the feeling he had while driving. It was the only time he felt like everything was the way it was supposed to be. It was more than just the speed and power that exhilarated him. He felt whole, like the vehicle was an extension of himself. He forgot every time someone had bullied him. He had forgotten every time he had to hold back; every time he had to hide who he really was. Behind the wheel, nothing could hold him back. He did not have to hide.  
  
    Kuro stared out the window as Jouten swerved in and out of traffic. He saw through all of the other passengers staring back at him as they passed. He leaned on his fist with a content smile on his lips. He squeezed his other hand into a fist. He flexed his toes and started to bounce his leg. Even though he was paying little attention to where they were, his intuition told him they were close and he became anxious.  
  
    It wasn't long before Kuro could not contain himself. His content smile evolved into an excited grin. He felt confident. He was ready for anything. He knew for sure it was going to be a good day. His small stature was pulsing with an enormous amount of positivity.  
     
    “We're here, kid,” Jouten could sense his son's thoughts were elsewhere. He slowly pulled into the parking lot.  
  
    The school was an average size. It was not a small town schoolhouse and it was not a campus metropolis. Jouten and Ayamaru put a lot of thought into where Kuro should go to school.  
  
    “Thanks, Dad,” Kuro smiled at him. His big, blue eyes were serene. As Jouten pulled up to the drop-off point, Kuro leaned over and hugged him.  
  
    With his foot firmly on the brake, Jouten squeezed Kuro as if he were trying to meld their two bodies together.  
  
    “Okay! Okay! I can't breathe!” Kuro squirmed in his father's grip.  
   
    Jouten smiled and reluctantly released him. “Have a good day at school.”  
  
    Kuro opened the door and hopped out. “I will. I love you!” He held the door open just long enough to hear his father reply.  
  
    “I love you, too,” Jouten could not hide his pride as a parent. He did his singular, manly wave to  Kuro.  
  
    When Kuro was out of sight, he pulled around and parked the car in the back of the packed parking lot. He took a deep breath and looked side to side for potential witnesses. Once he was sure the coast was clear, he willed himself home. 


	2. Picture Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A glimpse into Kuro's mundane school day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter isn't 100% finished yet but chapter three is up. You won't miss anything by reading it first. I'll finish chapter 2 before I post chapter 4. 
> 
> Also, this story is going to seem considerably more kiddy than The Trickster Trilogy. Things one start to get really grimy for a while.

    Kuro jogged up the stairs with one hand on the railing. The other children flowed around him like droplets of water. They were all singular and individual but they were pushed together, moving in the same direction. As the other children moved together in groups of twos and threes, he made his way to the top of the steps without a companion. There was a gap between Kuro and most of the other children. It was just a few inches but it felt like he was miles away from his peers.   
  
    There really was a distance between him and the other students. He assumed it was mostly because he hadn't really gotten a chance to get to know anyone. His parents home schooled him for what would have been his grade school years. They said it was important that he got out and experienced the world. He wouldn't want to stay there with them forever, especially now that he was almost a teenager.   
  
    Kuro wasn't totally mistaken. He was different. He was an individual consciousness among ghosts. His parents had been particularly meticulous in creating his schoolhouse. They flooded it with young spirits and souls that were trapped in Katharsi. They created a world in which they all played characters to enrich their son's life.   
  
    They were unconcerned with the ethical implications of such an action. They would not let Kuro's unique situation rob him of experiences every child needed. They wanted Kuro to be able to grow up and lead a normal life. Manipulating a mere handful of spirits was a small price to pay to broaden Kuro's horizons.  
  
    “You look dashing today, young man,” the compliment came from a woman dressed in a red blazer and skirt by the doors. She held them open along with several other administrators. Her skin was dark and it had started to wrinkle on her hands and around her eyes. Her hair was full of body and curls with a touch of gray. She smiled at him as their eyes met.   
  
    “Good morning, Mrs. Green!” Kuro's face lit up with glee. “I hope my mom really likes my pictures today.”   
  
    “Oh, I'm sure she will,” she looked down at him with a sweet and caring smile. “I'll see you after lunch for history,” she said kindly. She patted his shoulder and sent him into the school.  
  
    Kuro gave her a big smile and replied, “you know it's my favorite class!”   
  
_Well, it's my favorite academic class. Gym and art are really my favorite._   
  
    Kuro swiftly moved through the ocean of children between him and his locker. He dropped his backpack and spun the dial on the lock. He entered his combination and swung the locker door open. He put the books from his backpack into the locker and hung his bag up. He shut the door gently and spun the dial on his lock before walking to homeroom.   
      
    Kuro sat up front with his eyes fixated on the white board. Each stroke of the black, dry erase marker brought him one split second closer to his first class. He intently watched Mrs. Green as she moved back and forth across the room. She was by far the most enthusiastic teacher in the whole school. She seemed to live to teach. It made him smile because she seemed so happy.  
  
    Mrs. Green went over the basic schedule for the week. “I hope you all remembered to look your best today! It's picture day! Throughout the day, you'll be called down to the auditorium by the first letter of your last name,” she informed them kindly. “So, anyone with a last name starting with A will be called first...”   
  
_Yes! That's me! Kuro Akari! I can't wait!_  
  
    Kuro's excitement grew and he “Don't forget to hand the photographer your picture money before they take your photo. This tells them what background and package your parents picked,” she said over the low din of the classroom.   
  
    Kuro smiled. He wouldn't forget. He turned and pulled the white envelope out of his backpack. He folded it in half and placed it in his inside jacket pocket.  
  
    Mrs. Green started to hand out several papers. They were all different colors but according to Mrs. Green they were all equally important. “Don't lose these. The school needs you and your parents to read and sign these. You must return them by the end of the week,” she stated authoritatively.   
      
    Kuro organized the papers by color. He fanned them out to admire the pseudo-rainbow he had made. A part of him didn't want to have to wait until he got home to go over Then, the bell rang. He quickly stacked the papers and set them in a folder from his backpack. He stood up and swung it over his shoulder.  
  
    “Enjoy your classes everyone!” Mrs. Green projected her voice over the rustling of the students.  
  
    Kuro gave her a polite nod before following his classmates into the hallway. He moved swiftly around the other students. He made sure not to bump into anyone and wrinkle his perfect clothes. He didn't need to go to his locker. He was headed straight for P.E.   
  
_It's kinda cool everyone gets a free day in gym today._   
  
    Kuro arrived well before the bell. He sat on the bleachers near the doors. He anxiously bounced his foot.

 

.....To Be Continued!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this unfinished chapter is frustrating but I really appreciate your interest. I'll finish it soon. Hopefully posting this much will motivate me.


	3. He's Late

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jouten goes to Ordinaria to see Yume. He gets distracted and is late to pick Kuro up from school. Things don't go well after that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is chapter three. I finished it before I finished chapter two (which will be about Kuro's day at school). When I finish it, I'll post a note in chapter four so you know to fill in the gap.

When Jouten returned home he was met with a sense of loss. The long halls and large rooms of his dwelling were empty and lifeless without Ayamaru and Kuro. Left alone with his own thoughts, his apathetic and cynical nature was quickly returning. He had lost a part of himself when Ayamaru died. The importance of their mission was losing its hold on him. If he didn't do something fast, everything they did would have been meaningless. It quickly became obvious to him what he had to do.   
  
He felt himself drifting away; he needed to see Yume. He had to see the person he invested everything in. He hoped she could renew his faith and give him the strength to be the man he used to be. He had to make sure everything went according to plan. There were some things he couldn't leave to fate; he lacked Ayamaru's faith in Yume.  
  
Jouten made his way to the barrier between Katharsi and Ordinaria. Passing through grew more difficult each time he tried. He wondered if there were other spirits that were even still able to make the trip. The people in Ordinaria grew more and more unaware of Katharsi's existence. This time, he would be forced to take most of his consciousness with him. He could not risk being to weak to return to Kuro.   
  
He searched for Yume. He searched for the girl he had killed Ayamaru for, the girl that held the key to his salvation. Yume was Kuro's only hope. She had no idea he existed. She was blissfully unaware of the very real threat Ordinaria's modern culture was to Katharsi's existence. She had no idea why anyone but Misuteri would come for her from Katharsi. She had done her part; she had defeated Ayamaru. She was unconcerned with what was really at stake. In many ways, she was just like Kuro.   
  
Finding her was no simple task. There were millions of souls crying out for help. He could hear them, as the embodiment of Katharsi, he could hear them. He wondered how anyone could ignore such painful pleas. He refused to let them distract him. If they were strong enough, if they needed help badly enough, Katharsi would help them. They would find their answers on their own and if his plan succeeded, they would find peace much sooner.   
  
Jouten did eventually succeed in his endeavor. He pinpointed the tiny, country town Yume lived in. He honed in on the distinct signature of her spiritual energy. It wasn't long before he found the dark pink color of her aura. He felt her before he saw her. He found her walking towards the center of town.   
  
It was mid-afternoon in early spring. The air was warm and the sun was high for a day so close to winter. Her backpack sat high over both of her shoulders. She kept her big, blue eyes forward. She smiled as the music from her MP3 player vibrated through her. She kept her hands in the pockets of her unzipped, black hoodie. She stomped down the soft earth of the grassy hill as she took a shortcut towards her destination.  
  
If Jouten hadn't known any better, he probably wouldn't have looked twice at such a plain looking girl. Her round face and her small mouth made her look evermore like a child. She didn't wear much make-up and he could see the blond roots of her natural hair color beginning to come in against the stark dark brown color that she died it. Her pale white skin reflected the sunlight and hid her teenage blemishes. She lacked the exquisite appearance of Ayamaru; but it was unmistakably her.   
  
 He could tell by the high, perky shape of her large breasts and the curve of her tiny waist down to her hips. It was difficult for him not to lust after the fifteen year old girl before him. He could feel the loose fabric of her black tank top ripping in his grasp as he squeezed her breast in his hand. He could almost taste her as he drove his tongue forcefully into her mouth. He could feel him yanking at the top button of her almost too tight jeans.   
  
Jouten shook his head and reined in his desire. He was supposed to be watching over Yume. It was his responsibility to guide her back to Katharsi and educate her. His feelings for Ayamaru couldn't interfere with his mission. Yume didn't know him; she didn't even know he was really the one that killed Ayamaru.   
  
Jouten took his form. He planted his feet on the ground not far behind Yume. He donned a casual outfit, similar to Yume's, just in case she was paying close enough attention to sense him. He neared Yume. He intended to walk beside her and experience things as she did.   
  
Yume paused for a moment at the base of the hill. She turned towards the small, brick church to her left and then back behind her. She drew in a deep breath of the crisp air and her smile grew wider. She felt both free and grounded. She had never experienced such a sensation before.   
  
She would have never thought such a thing were possible. She was single, unattached and uncommitted to anything but herself. She didn't have to concern herself with the morality of maintaining a respectful relationship. She didn't have to worry about someone else's feelings but the most mind blowing part was no one else's actions had control over her.   
  
It didn't matter what Shinri was doing right now; she didn't care. She didn't have to worry about whether or not he was going to call her. She wasn't anxiously staring at her cell phone waiting for it to ring. She wasn't racked with nervousness as she waited for him to text her back. She was free and she didn't feel bad about it. She didn't feel bad about herself.   
  
For the first time in Yume's life, she felt confident. She felt truly confident. She believed in herself and in her potential. She didn't concern herself with being good enough for anyone; she simply was good enough. If she was good enough for herself – and by her high standards that was a quite a feat – she was good enough for anyone else, no matter what they had to say about it.   
  
Jouten watched her curiously. He could feel something was different than the last time he had seen her. He couldn't tell if her battle with Ayamaru had changed her or if it was something else. She was at peace. She wasn't burdened by her insecurities or doubts. He watched as she was simply able to appreciate the moment. The angry and confused girl he had seen at the beginning of Ayamaru's journey had almost vanished.   
  
Jouten was almost floored. He hadn't thought it possible for such a drastic change to happen in such a short time. He deduced it had been less than a year and he knew very well the high volume of distractions in Ordinaria. He hadn't seen Yume in Katharsi since. He thought she was in shock after what happened but she couldn't have been. In order for such a phenomenon to take place, that was impossible.   
  
Yume had genuinely impressed Jouten. He saw Ayamaru's fire and confidence surging through Yume. They really had become one person again. Yume had no way of appreciating the gravity of such a significant event but Jouten could. He did appreciate it and her. He admired her emotional resilience and her strength of will. It had been a very long time since he saw such qualities in someone from Ordinaria but it wasn't like he had been looking.   
  
Jouten looked down at Yume and smiled. It wasn't long before she continued walking. He was suddenly satisfied. Yume's growth and self-confidence renewed his faith in her. She would continue to be the one thing in Ordinaria that he believed in.  
  
 The pressure of being a single father weighed down on Jouten. He had to return to Katharsi. He didn't want to leave her there, on her own. He wanted to stay to guide and protect her from the world and people that would dull her light but he couldn't. Kuro needed him, too. He had a son that depended on him. Ayamaru wasn't there to pick up the slack when he wanted to indulge on a whim. He no longer had many luxuries that she afforded him. 

* * *

  
  
Jouten had left Kuro waiting outside his school long after his last class. Kuro sat on the wide, cement steps he had climbed so confidently earlier that day. He already had enough time to finish his homework. It wasn't enough to take him long but that wasn't the point. This had never happened before. Someone was always there to pick him up and take him home. His belly grumbled and he frowned.   
  
_Something's off...something isn't right..._  
  
Kuro's intuition screamed at him but he dismissed it. If something was really wrong his parents would have told him. They would have been honest with him; it didn't matter what it was. They loved him. They would never lie to him; they would never deceive him. He trusted them unequivocally because he loved them so much.   
  
He should have listened to himself. He had his mother's intuition and it was finally starting to show. He was finally old enough to begin to use his inner strengths. He knew his mother and father were strong and powerful; he knew someday, he would be, too. He knew it was only a matter of time but he was young. He didn't know any better. He was still a boy that needed his parents.  
  
Another forty five minutes passed before Jouten arrived. The large, black S.U.V. pulled around the long bend of the parameter of the parking lot. He could see Kuro sitting alone on the steps, waiting for him. He felt terrible. He had completely lost all sense of time in Ordinaria. What felt like ten minutes to Yume was more than Kuro's entire school day.   
  
Kuro noticed right away but he didn't move. He kept his elbows firmly planted on the tops of his thighs and glared at the vehicle as it approached. When his father stopped and rolled down the passenger window to call out to him, Kuro made sure his scowl met his father's eyes. It didn't matter that Jouten was nearly three times his size. Kuro stared his father down fearlessly.   
  
Jouten closed his eyes and sighed. Had such a look come from anyone else, he would have gotten out of the car and in their face so fast, they wouldn't have had time to blink. He couldn't do such a thing to his son. Besides, felt like he deserved it. Jouten sunk his head low and made sure the doors were unlocked. He slowly turned his tired, sad eyes towards his son. “Look, I'm sorry, dude...” he was sincere.   
  
_Damn him._   
  
Kuro really hated it when his dad gave him puppy eyes, just like his mom. Jouten was so big, so strong and yet, his most effective weapon was that look. Kuro grumbled. He stopped clenching his jaw and rolled his eyes. He threw himself to his feet without grabbing the railing and snatched his backpack up.   
  
“Alright!” Jouten exclaimed gleefully. “Let's go home,” he said while trying to smile.   
  
Kuro half ignored his father as he jumped into the car. He was full of angst and frustration. He couldn't really figure out why. Sure, he was mad at Jouten for being late but that wasn't really it. He was rapidly growing into a teenager and he was being blindsided by the change.   
  
Jouten's smile faded. He watched Kuro stare out the window out of the corner of his eye. Most of the happiness he felt when he saw Yume was gone. Kuro sucked it right out of him. He pulled forward and out of the parking lot.   
  
 Kuro was so much like his mother, Jouten could barely look at him. His stubbornness, his impulsiveness, and his high standards, those were all things she taught him. It wasn't that he couldn't see himself in Kuro; oh, no, Ayamaru would have never allowed that. She constantly teased him about being too sensitive; about liking sweets too much; and even being too honest with Kuro. It was just that every time he looked at Kuro, he saw Ayamaru and it hurt.  
  
The pair drove home in silence. Jouten found it almost physically painful while Kuro seemed to revel in it. Jouten could see the reflection of the tiny smiles that Kuro tried to hide from him. He didn't take the highway home. He knew the second they got there, Kuro was going to look for Ayamaru and he knew she wouldn't be there. He had been so distracted with Yume that he had forgotten to figure out a cover story.  
  
Jouten almost couldn't think. Ayamaru and Yume clouded his thoughts. Every time he tried to focus, some little, insignificant thing would pull him back under. He couldn't control where his mind drifted off to or for how long.   
  
Jouten sat hunched forward with both hands on the wheel. He switched between gripping it tight and tapping his thumbs. He paid little attention to the speed limit signs. He behaved completely opposite of his calm, confident self. He had never found it difficult to lead by example when Kuro was around; with Ayamaru, yes, but not with Kuro. He was rarely ever in a rush to get anywhere or do anything. He was often able to enjoy his son's company despite his inner turmoil.   
  
Kuro noticed his father fidgeting and decided to throw him a bone. “When we get home is dinner gonna be done? I'm hungry,” Kuro softened his expression and looked over at his father.   
  
Kuro's question didn't shake Jouten's impending sense of doom but it helped. He looked to his right and said, “I was actually hoping you'd help me cook dinner tonight.” That was partly a lie. Jouten hadn't thought about dinner all day. It was another thing he completely forgot. “Are you craving anything?” Luckily he was able to make a quick recovery.  
  
Kuro frowned. “No, I'm just starving.”   
  
“Alright, well, why don't I start a pizza while you change. It won't take long and you'll have plenty of time to finish your homework,” Jouten kept his eyes on the road. He was confident that he had come to a reasonable solution.   
  
“I don't know why Mom doesn't already have dinner done,” Kuro furrowed his eyebrows and pouted. “Besides I already finished my homework because you were late! And I don't need to change just to eat. I'm not a little kid anymore!” Kuro's emotions boiled to the surface. They erupted from his heart straight passed his lips before he could stop them.   
  
Jouten was stunned. He almost completely stopped paying attention to the road and looked at Kuro. His son had never snapped at him like that but then again, he had never failed to meet Kuro's expectations. He was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Kuro was old enough to know better but Jouten felt like he deserved it.  
  
  He was the father after all. It was about time he stopped trying to be Kuro's friend and start acting like it. He didn't know exactly what to do. Ayamaru had been the disciplinarian most of the time. His only hope was to emulate her example. He contemplated pulling over and giving Kuro a lecture but that wasn't really his style. Jouten simply scowled at Kuro and tried not to show his unhappiness. If he knew his son well enough, that was all he needed to do to make sure  he knew he had done something wrong.  
  
 _Oh, crap. What just happened?_   
  
Kuro felt terrible. He didn't need to see the scorn in his father's dark blue eyes. He frowned and looked away. He was still confused but most of his frustration faded. He had unintentionally taken it out on Jouten and didn't even realize it.   
  
Jouten's eyes quickly made their way back to the road. They may have been the only vehicle on the tiny country street but he remained vigilant. It didn't take long for the tiny remnants of anger he had to fade away. Kuro never piqued his temper like Ayamaru and he was thankful for that.   
  
Kuro was the one left uncomfortable in the silence now. He fidgeted with his backpack straps and bounced his foot. His long, black hair was full as a result of his brazen temper. His face was stuck in a pouty frown. He caught a glance of his expression in the passenger door window.  
  
 _Grrr. Why am I such a kid?_   
  
He contemplated smacking the window or himself but he didn't. His dad was still there and he was determined to save face. He grit his teeth together and squeezed his fists. He pretended his dad didn't notice but he did.   
  
It was hard for Jouten to ignore Kuro's tiny pleas for help. Ayamaru was right. He needed to be around other people. They couldn't keep coddling him. Kuro needed to learn how to deal with different situations without them coming to the rescue. He was almost a teenager and they, more than anyone, knew what that meant. He was doing more than coming into his own; he was growing into his new powers.   
  
They were nearing the mountainside. Jouten knew Kuro wanted to bolt the second they got home. He had to take advantage of what little alone time they had. “Ya know, kid, it gets easier,” Jouten said softly. He looked over at Kuro and smiled. “You have to believe that or the world's gonna eat you alive.”   
  
Kuro turned his head slowly and looked at his father.   
  
_Yeah, like you have any idea what it's like to not know what to do Mr. Perfect._   
  
The boy dismissed his father's wisdom.   
  
“No matter how hard it gets, even if you're all alone, you're gonna pull through, never forget that,” Jouten softened his face. He was almost begging Kuro to believe him. Kuro had no idea how hard it was for him to say something like that. Jouten was his father. He always wanted to be there for him, to save him if he needed it; but that wasn't fair to either of them. “I love you, Kuro, I know you know that,” he said as they pulled up into the driveway.   
  
Kuro looked down at his lap. He tried not to frown. It wasn't necessarily unusual for his father to be a huge sap but this felt different. It felt more like one of those life-lesson type deals and he didn't understand.   
  
_Why now? Why say something like that now?_   
  
Jouten parked and killed the engine. He took a deep breath and watched Kuro out of the corner of his eye. He hoped his son wouldn't get out of the car without replying.   
  
Kuro sat there with his hand on the door handle. “I know. Thanks, Dad. I love you, too,” he said hastily without looking Jouten in the eye. He pulled the narrow piece of plastic in his hand towards him and jumped out of the car. He headed up the narrow pathway towards his mother's flower garden.   
  
He wasn't hungry anymore. He just wanted to go to his room. He wanted to be alone so he could breathe again. He couldn't stand his father's sad eyes staring at him like that.   
  
_It's like he has no idea how pathetic he makes me feel._   
  
For the first time in Kuro's entire life, he resented his father. Jouten had always been there. He always had some tiny snippet of wisdom, whereas he needed applicable knowledge. It was clear he didn't know something and he had no idea what questions to ask to figure out what it was. He was so frustrated; he felt so helpless.   
  
_I'm perfect, huh? There's nothing I can't do if I set my mind to it, right?_   
  
He heard his parents' praises in his head as he struggled. They infuriated him more.   
  
_Screw you, guys! You have no idea what you're talking about!_  
  
He blamed them just as much as he blamed himself. They were partially responsible. This was nothing in comparison to some of the real internal struggles Kuro would experience in the near future. Ayamaru knew that. Kuro was on the precipice of finding out who he really was and what his purpose was in life. Ayamaru and Jouten, as parents, could not manipulate the events of an important crucible just so Kuro didn't struggle. However, they had never intended there to be such dire external circumstances happening simultaneously.   
  
Jouten exhaled sharply. His head rocked back against the headrest and he closed his eyes. He squeezed the steering wheel tightly and then, exhaled abruptly again. He could feel his pain and Kuro's. It made his chest hurt and the pit in his stomach grew. He rolled his eyes open and watched his son climb the steep path inside. He tried not to chastise himself. He could barely let go of his dread and frustration. The entire situation was so messed up, so complicated, he could barely comprehend it; and they were asking their son to understand.   
  
Jouten groaned and sighed once more before warping himself inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I've made both Kuro's and Jouten's situation pretty easy to relate to. So I hope you're not rooting for one side or the other yet. :) 
> 
> Thanks for reading!


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